Blog: It’s Been A Long Time Since I Posted a Blog…

I haven’t written anything since my October rant about everything pink.  Lot’s to update, so here goes:

I’ve gained about 15 pounds which I’m working on losing.  Being overweight is not good for a cancer survivor.  Exercise seems to be hit and miss for me.  I need to do better.  I’ve been walking some and adding in running for 1-2 miles during my walks.  I was sidelined with terrible hip pain for a few months, but I think whatever was going on has resolved itself.

I had a mastoplexy surgery (breast lift on the right side to match my fake breast on the left) in November, 2014 which was a breeze.  I was sore for a few weeks but the scar never seemed to heal correctly.  I complained to my Oncologist about it and she insisted I contact my Plastic Surgeon about it.  Turns out I have what’s called a hypertrophic scar so I’m getting steroid injections in it which seems to help.  I’ve already had two sessions and I am scheduled for another next month (May).

My hair is back to normal.  When it was growing out I wasn’t sure if it would ever grow enough to cover my head. After chemo, hair grows back like a baby so it’s thin and wispy.  The hair on top of my head grew back straight, but the back was kinky, kinky curly.  Very odd.  My stylist, Sabina, laughed and said it was nearly impossible to cut it evenly due to the curls.  After about six months, she cut the back and voila! it grew back straight.  No more chemo curls!  Anyway, now when I look at myself I no longer see chemo hair — but a normal cut  The one thing I haven’t done is dye my hair.  I figure I might as well leave it natural.  I have totally white hair.  No gray.  It’s pretty cool looking.  (Secretly, I figure if my cancer returns I’ll lose my hair again anyway to chemo — I may as well save the money I was spending on coloring my hair.)

I had my follow-up mammogram and ultrasound in March, 2015.  Everything was fine and I had a good appointment with my surgical oncologist the same day.  I was a little surprised she wanted to see me again in six months.  I guess that’s her normal follow-up with surgical patients.

So, I’ve made it out of my first year as a cancer survivor.  In some ways it’s comforting, but in many ways it’s also disturbing.  You see, I have TNBC (Triple Negative Breast Cancer) which is the most aggressive breast cancer one can have.  TNBC has no receptors that can be utilized to stop a recurrence.  Luminal (or hormone positive) can be treated with Tamoxifen or Arimidex to block the production of hormones following chemotherapy.  Her-2 Breast Cancer can be treated with Herceptin following chemotherapy.  There is no drug I can take following chemotherapy to stop a recurrence.

You see, even though my cancer  was caught early, I only have a 65-75% chance of survival at five years.  TNBC most often recurs during years 2-3 so I’m spending lots of time checking my breasts and worrying about any ache or pain.  I hate it.  Sometimes it feels like I’m consumed with worrying that my cancer has returned. I’ve been thinking about joining a support group or perhaps talking to a psychologist because I seem to be obsessed with worry.  I’ve decided I’m going to talk to my oncologist next month to see if there’s someone I can talk with.  My one saving grace is that I can call my sister-in-law, who is a four year breast cancer survivor, and talk to her.  She’s really wonderful — but I hope I can find someone local who I can regularly speak with.

Leon and I subscribe now to Blue Apron so we get dinner ingredients and recipes delivered to us weekly.  We’ve really enjoyed the varied menu and are definitely eating healthier.  I’m proud that we’ve been so willing to try meals we never would have just a year ago.  Now, if I could only get my between meal snacking under control…

So, that’s my update for now.  I’ll let you know if I find someone to talk to.  Cheers and good health to all!